|16.46 CET, July 1, 1999
Today it's exactly two years ago these pages started. I didn't know what i was getting myself into. In the beginning, there were only two pages: the timetable and the first entry. The first week i was brooding about what i had written and playing around with gifanimations. A friend had to tell me that i should start adding pages, and that i had enough material already. I was still waiting for perfection.
The following weeks stand out in my mind as brilliantly happy. I remember lying on the couch, thinking about having a conversation with David Bowie, sitting on the edge of a stage. He was asking me what my perfect man should be like, and i answered: "Bicyclerepairman!" (I did have a flat tyre at the time. I'm horrible in mending tyres. Once i managed to end up with more holes than i started out with. Then i decided to let the professionals mend my tyres for me. In 1997, i decided to start walking. I came to enjoy that so much, i waited till December 30 before i mended my tyre. Myself!)
I did become more ambitious. I wanted to make something important, something complicated. It took me a year and a half to realise that that is exactly what i shouldn't do. Homebase is very dear to me, but it is a failure. There are a lot of hidden treasures in there. My first ever diary page, written when i was nine years old. But as a whole it is too confusing. I will leave it online though, and maybe someday start to work on it again. Presents came as a complete surprise. I was invited for a small exhibit in Amsterdam, and i made a "The Best of Ellen". In the week of the exhibit i made some new pages. "Een vrije dag" became the starting point of Presents. I'm still very happy about the title. I was thinking about prologue (yeah, i like these kind of titles), and while looking it up in the dictionary, my eye fell on the word presents. Exactly right!
I don't know how long Presents will continue. Right now, my life is changing. I'm looking for a new job. Maybe i'm gonna move. I don't know. I hope i can keep on making these pages. They follow, twist, turn, contradict, change, ignore and celebrate my life. But my life comes first.
I still got a couple months ahead of me, and a free August, where i can spend the entire day working on Presents. The best vacation i can imagine!
I've got to get ready now. This evening i'm gonna see The Matrix. At six o'clock i've got to be in Rotown. And i promised to get the tickets before that!
I don't know what i'm gonna make tomorrow. But i'll tell you this: i'm gonna be a different woman! Don't worry, you'll see! :-P